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[ week one ➝ hannibal ]
[ The afternoon was honestly, a blur. He remembers talking to Ezio, curt and to the point and trying not to readily admit his reasons for this. He remembers putting together a sandwich and being annoyed that he ate something that Hannibal hadn't cooked for him. He remembers trying not to focus on Hannibal outside for a while before realizing that if he was going to do this, he'd need supplies.
So, there was a moment where Will left the hotel again on a straight shot to the General Store. He didn't look in the way of Hannibal and instead kept his eyes down and his stride direct. He wasn't sure what he would find there but he's thinking, vaguely, of Molly, which hurts in a way he doesn't quite want right now. He puts his frustrations into searching, thinking of what Molly enjoyed here. She liked candles and tea, of soft soaps and herbs that filled up their steamy bathroom and made even Will feel drowsy with contentment. He remembers sharing those times with her, of dozing with his nose pressed into her hair and soft music filling the room.
He doesn't quite realize he's back at the room until he's standing there with a pack of candles, some bath oils, and pockets full of herbs. It's not quite losing time but... but it's a near thing. He looks out the window to see Hannibal and Percy, talking to each other in the middle of their work.
Will is here though and he's committed and he's staying the -- well, he's not exactly staying the night but he is spending a while on Hannibal's couch without any urge to leave. He gets to work soon after, setting the bathroom up and going downstairs to put on some tea. It takes some effort and Will nearly abandons the venture altogether but in the end, everything is prepared just around the time Will spots Hannibal finishing and heading back to the hotel.
He hates this. He hates this. Why did he offer? What possessed him to do this?
When Hannibal finally gets there, the bathroom door is closed but even the outer room smells good from the bath, like lavender and herbal tea and warm milk. The tea Will picked is, of course, chamomile and Will sits on the couch, mug in hand and looking like he's been holding his breath much too long. He bites out immediately instead of a greeting -- ]
I changed rooms with Ezio for the night.
[ God damnit. ]
So, there was a moment where Will left the hotel again on a straight shot to the General Store. He didn't look in the way of Hannibal and instead kept his eyes down and his stride direct. He wasn't sure what he would find there but he's thinking, vaguely, of Molly, which hurts in a way he doesn't quite want right now. He puts his frustrations into searching, thinking of what Molly enjoyed here. She liked candles and tea, of soft soaps and herbs that filled up their steamy bathroom and made even Will feel drowsy with contentment. He remembers sharing those times with her, of dozing with his nose pressed into her hair and soft music filling the room.
He doesn't quite realize he's back at the room until he's standing there with a pack of candles, some bath oils, and pockets full of herbs. It's not quite losing time but... but it's a near thing. He looks out the window to see Hannibal and Percy, talking to each other in the middle of their work.
Will is here though and he's committed and he's staying the -- well, he's not exactly staying the night but he is spending a while on Hannibal's couch without any urge to leave. He gets to work soon after, setting the bathroom up and going downstairs to put on some tea. It takes some effort and Will nearly abandons the venture altogether but in the end, everything is prepared just around the time Will spots Hannibal finishing and heading back to the hotel.
He hates this. He hates this. Why did he offer? What possessed him to do this?
When Hannibal finally gets there, the bathroom door is closed but even the outer room smells good from the bath, like lavender and herbal tea and warm milk. The tea Will picked is, of course, chamomile and Will sits on the couch, mug in hand and looking like he's been holding his breath much too long. He bites out immediately instead of a greeting -- ]
I changed rooms with Ezio for the night.
[ God damnit. ]
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He stops in the hall once he enters it, and his hand hovers against the wall lightly like he's hesitating. For anyone watching, it would be a reaction like an odd sound had caught his attention, since he's attentive, but curious. It's not a sound, though. It's a smell. He's hardly forgotten about Will's blurted out offer, but he's still rather surprised that Will actually seems to have... followed through. And so there's a moment where Hannibal stops, closes his eyes, and breathes in slowly, half-savoring this moment, and half-committing it to memory.
But it is only a moment's pause, lest Will actually hear that he paused at all and was weird about it. There's at least a familiarity between them enough that he doesn't feel the need to knock, because Will will know that Hannibal already knows he's there. But when he opens the door with a soft smile, it rather quickly turns to surprise. ]
...Well.
[ This was also unexpected. Hannibal steps inside and closes the door after himself, though as he looks to the Hannibal, he pauses, shakes his head, then looks to Will again. ]
I'm glad that he agreed. I'm also surprised that you asked.
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He speaks after a moment and there's enough of a delay to indicate Will's mind is distracted, is not quite fully there. He's thinking of too much and most things, he wouldn't admit. He does realize that eventually, he'll have to sort out how he feels about Hannibal to focus more on the game and not being caught up in it. Yet still, like an anchoring point, he fixates. ]
I'm surprised that I asked too. I didn't mean to, but I saw him and I did. It was... [ He considers. ] Impulsive.
[ And then considers again and adds on -- ]
Most of today has been impulsive, actually. I did run a bath, in the end.
[ He gestures at the closed bathroom door but doesn't make any indication that he wants to show Hannibal inside or do anything but stand here and stare. His eyes trickle down even and he catches himself, seeing the dirt on Hannibal's fingers and picturing blood. It makes his head swim. ]
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He's all the more certain of that with the pause.
As always with Will's lapses into silence, Hannibal is patient—curious, but not pushing. Will says that he "saw him" and Hannibal tilts his head very lightly to the side. The gesture itself clearly asks "who," but he verbalizes it too. ]
Saw who, Will?
[ Hannibal has a guess, but, hey. Will has a track record with seeing people that aren't actually there, so better ask...
His eyes follow the line of Will's gesture, briefly to the door, but he's not surprised by it. His lips do quirk up in a smile when Will admits it, since he is touched, in a way, but he turns his attention back. He would genuinely like the bath, since a problem with his "hobbies" is that they do tend to be messy, but he'd also like to put his attention here. At least so long as Will would allow it before withdrawing again. ]
I must say, I'm glad for it. Your impulsiveness is quite kind to me. [ He has to joke about it first, but seeing how Will's gaze flickers down to his hands, Hannibal holds one of them up to look at it himself. ] Are you picturing blood instead?
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He can't help though, but swing around back to his worry -- he's dead, isn't it? Or he's in a coma. Or. Something. This isn't real, right? No, it is. It is real. It isn't. ]
Ezio. I didn't ask until I saw him and wanted to be here tonight instead. There was nothing -- nothing hallucinogenic about it, Hannibal.
[ Not this time, he wants to add but that might spill him over into crazier than usual territory. He likes to think he has a firm hold on his sanity right now, despite the circumstances. Of course, he keeps watching Hannibal, watches the blood red slide off his fingertips and drip down to the floor and Will wants so desperately to share in it. Wants to slide his fingers into the warmth and over Hannibal and inside Hannibal to feel his beating heart underneath all those wonderful layers of flesh and blood.
When Hannibal quips, Will wants to roll his eyes and comment about his last burst of impulsiveness. The one that had Hannibal slipping away from Jack Crawford and Alana Bloom and straight into Will's arms. It was kind, wasn't it? If Hannibal needed a cage, Will would happily suffice.
The question catches him off guard, he hadn't thought -- but of course, of course Hannibal noticed. His eyes flick up to his face and suddenly Hannibal is soaked. He is soaked with blood and smiling and handsome and everything Will wants for himself. Will wants to smile back and touch and love but he blinks again and Hannibal is normal. No blood to be found. ]
Yes. If we were in Cuba, I could have it, couldn't I? You, exactly as I want, with your hands stained red and your stomach full.
ok dear everyone reading on unlock this shit is why tiara got chopped into cubes
[ He's toying with his words here, pulling both at that idea that none of this is real (though he does know it's real enough), but also how Hannibal had seen that dark part of Will and helped pull it to the surface. He can see the latter in how Will's attention shifts. It's easy for him to guess what Will sees, not as a hallucination, but as fantasy.
He rubs his hands on his shirt idly. There's no handkerchief in his outfit right now, but there's a sense he's trying to clean his hands. ]
That is the idea. Going so far that not even the most dutiful of detectives will want to follow.
[ He's cleaning his hands because after he says that, Hannibal reaches out to Will. It's funny, and he realizes it, because he had never hesitated to bloody him before. But with dirt, he's apparently more tender and careful. He takes a step forward to close that distance between them, and so long as Will allows it, he'll to put a hand on his face. Hannibal gently cups his cheek, but even his touch is tenuous, as if he too is wondering when they would hit the water and this moment would vanish. ]
But you could have it now too, you know. To me, this place is farther from our troubles than Cuba.
i'm so sorry!!!!
He watches Hannibal wipe his hands off on his shirt and he isn't sure why exactly that's happening, wondering if he's imagining it along with the blood because of how incongruent the image is. He realizes a moment later that the cause is the dirt and he's torn between reactions, neither of which he can give because then Hannbal is touching him and Will is stepping in closer and how could Will have pretended he wasn't in love with this man from the moment he said You will and called Will problem-free with such sincerity that Will nearly choked on his sausage from laughter.
Will turns his head to press his nose into Hannibal's palm, breath coming out against the skin in a hot and wet exhale. His hand moves up to grip Hannibal's wrist in response, the other shooting forward to grip the front of his shirt and keep him there. Hannibal smells like corpse and earth and blood, but he also smells like the subtle cologne he wears and paper and a herb Will can't place. The tension eases from his shoulder and his eyes open again as he turns his face back to Hannibal. ]
I won't risk it, Hannibal. Mob mentality on caged animals, one strike of a match and we both go up in flame. I can't survive the separation.
[ He pulls Hannibal's hand off of him then, hand curled loosely around the wrist. The one in Hannibal's shirt lets go then and he uses it to press Hannibal's fingers down, pushing it closed into a fist. With the hand in both of his and the fingers closed, Will presses his mouth to the knuckles of his hand in a completely dry, completely chaste kiss. When he pulls away, he simply says -- ]
You should have the bath. I'll sit with you if you need me to.
[ Which isn't a typical offer on Will's part but he feels it. He feels what Hannibal feels and that underlining tension of not being cleaned, messing so thoroughly with Hannibal's order -- combined with his insurmountable amount of emotion for Will. He could sit with him. That could work, couldn't it? ]
tiara got eaten for this
[ There's a slight double-meaning in his words there, but simply put as it is, it's probably too obscured for anyone but Hannibal to know it. He couldn't in the sense that he agrees with Will, that separation was the last thing he wanted. But he also couldn't in the sense that he's felt that way for a long time now. He couldn't bear the separation, and so he had turned himself in knowing full well that there was a possibility that he would never leave wherever justice would decide to send them. Only a possibility, because even then, as he had knelt in the snow looking at Will, not Jack Crawford, he knew that one day Will would return to him.
He had hoped it would be like this, too.
His breathing is slow and very calm as Will moves his hand, only taking a deeper breath when Will presses that kiss against his hand. Again, he closes his eyes, if only briefly. He had wanted to savor the moment earlier of that realization that Will was waiting for him, but with this gesture, he's sure that he wants to remember these moments. It's another room in his palace, and when he opens his eyes again, it's with an affectionate smile. A disproportionate number of those rooms seem to be about Will Graham, at least by comparison to any other person.
When Will draws his hand away, Hannibal looks at his own hand briefly, but lets it drop back to his side. His eyes are undoubtedly glassy with the fondness he feels in that moment, but the corners of his eyes do show just a bit more of a wry smile at Will's offer. ]
Naturally. I wouldn't want to waste your efforts.
[ It's also fairly genuinely flattering, and that's not something that Hannibal tends to feel about other peoples' gestures. He walks towards the bathroom, and the actual answer comes with a slight nod. ]
I do not need it. But I would be grateful for it.
i'm still sorry
So, instead he lingers at the corners while Hannibal goes into the bathroom. It isn't lit in anything more than a few candles, light dim and peaceful. The bath itself is filled and hot enough to steam the room and the soothing scent is even stronger. Will definitely put the works into the bath, even if he felt conflicted the whole time. There's even, at the head of a tub, a towel folded and waiting there as a type of headrest. That was a particularly painful gesture for Will but he did it anyway, let himself fold the towel up to rest. ]
I keep feeling like I should ask for clarification, you know. About what you need from me. Want from me.
[ He pauses, considers, lingers in the doorway of the bathroom. ]
Or even, what I can take from you.
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Will speaks as he resumes undressing himself, clearly not hesitant at all about doing so. The dress shirt is set aside, not even with care, considering it's filthy, and his undershirt pulled off after. The Verger brand is of course still there, but it's more faded now by a few years. It's just as much a part of him as any of his other scars, and he's not particularly self-conscious about any of them either. He's been silent as Will speaks, patiently waiting for him to finish, but his answer comes easily. More easily than Will's could, most likely, but this is also something that Hannibal has been considering far longer than Will. ]
I haven't given the clarification because I have none to provide. What I need and what I want are one and the same, and I have it. For a while, though the moment of change I would have a difficult time pinpointing.
[ He looks back to Will pointedly, but it's with a soft, fond smile. ]
This is all I want and need. You, as you are.
[ It's very sappy, to say the least, but it's also genuine. So long as they've known each other, Hannibal has never really wanted much more from Will. Sometimes he was curious about what Will would do in situations, once, he had offered Will an outstretched hand to live a life like this earlier, but those have all settled now. His intellectual curiosity has quieted, and though it wasn't quite the same as that first time he had offered, Hannibal thought Will had taken the hand as they'd embraced on the cliff's edge. His desires had been satisfied in that moment. So much so that he had no problem falling.
Though, to the second question, he turns his back to Will again slightly as he continues undressing. They're definitely going to have this conversation where Hannibal is just completely nude, but, hey. Not te first time he's had serious conversations with his dick out. Actually, it happens a lot, relatively speaking. ]
So, I would give you the same courtesy. You can take from me whatever it is you need and want. I would not have put it quite this way, but for the purpose of this conversation, I was quite willing to give you my life. [ Because if he'd wanted to, he imagined he could have probably stopped them from tumbling off the cliff. But he hadn't. ] What would you take, Will?
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He also finds his eyes wandering, taking in the physical appearance of Hannibal for once. Will's never really had a reason to watch and beyond a passing notice that Hannibal was attractive, their entire relationship had always been intensely intimate on an emotional level -- not physical. He's also still unsure about his feelings on the fact that Hannibal's a man, eyes catching on the chest of hair and resting there for a moment. That's new. ]
Everything.
[ He breathes out slowly, leaning more solidly on the doorjamb and crossing his arms over his chest. His eyes skirt away towards the wall, staring into nothing. ]
I don't want to be your friend, or just your friend. I think we've fallen into something decidedly romantic and it's not exactly where I expected to end up. With you. I'm not opposed any longer.
[ It's almost curt how he delivers it, stripped bare from their usual circular speech, steeped in metaphor and dripping with intent. But here, with things so different and motivations so muddled, Will needs one bit of clarity for clarity's sake. Saying this means no turning back, they are a romantic couple -- full stop. There is no other way to define them. ]
I... don't think I want that to be in question during these upcoming weeks. I've been reborn, for you, and this Will Graham is yours. That's something I can promise now, as long as it's mutual.
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But for an absolute, and for how Will continues— It takes his breath away.
Quite literally, as it turns out, because there's a pause in the rise and fall of Hannibal's chest as he stands at the tub's edge. His eyes grow glassy, as they often do when he and Will share these more delicate conversations, but as always, he manages to hold back the tears that threaten to come forth. He feels-- happy. Happy, and overwhelmed, all at once, and as he releases that breath, he turns back to Will. His smile is genuine, if wry, because he's repeating words he's said before. ]
It's all I've ever wanted for both of us.
[ It's a simple response, but for once, he doesn't need to add much more or steep it in their poetry. He continues to undress, and it's only once he starts to step into the tub and sink into the water that he speaks again. ]
So it's no question. I'll consider the cliff our engagement, so to speak. [ Though he adds wryly after a moment while he settles ] Or perhaps eloping would be a better word.
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He's struck then that he does not want to go back into the room. So, he shifts and strips down as Hannibal does -- not to the nude because there's still an icy feeling in him as he thinks of taking off his shirt in front of Hannibal, of letting the smile be seen again -- and instead it's to his boxers and t-shirt. He'll close the bathroom door behind him, leaving them in the candlelit room filled with warmth and relaxing smells. A few steps forward and he's lowering himself to the floor next to the tub, in a way that they'd be sitting shoulder to shoulder if there wasn't the porcelain barrier between them.
Despite all this, when he speaks it's still watery and breathy with emotion. ]
It's beautiful.
[ It's a bathroom with a mixture of scents and candles and in a place filled with death but what he means, truly, is any life with Hannibal is exactly what Will wants. He can't bear separation now, it would shatter him whole.
He draws his knees up to his chest then, resting his forehead against them as he continues to take shuddering breaths. His eyes close and he sniffs before letting out a wet laugh. ]
Freddie Lounds would have a field day. [ . . . ] Is having a field day.
[ Then a question, his curiosity needs Hannibal to sate it. ]
You shattered my marriage. Why?
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He thinks of something wry for a moment, a "I'm glad you haven't changed your mind," because it would be impossible at this point. It would be sincere from anyone else, but between the two of them, it was a joke. They both knew that they were inexorably intertwined. The cliche was that until death do they part, but clearly, by being here, they went beyond even that. Even in his most romantic imaginings, he couldn't have dreamed of this. Hannibal may know that this isn't technically death, but considering how they arrived here, he could hardly think of it as anything but.
He opens his eyes again as Will draws up, though his eyes stay directed to the ceiling as if he were looking up at the stars instead. He almost says something romantic and poetic, but Will speaks first. The comment draws a laugh out of him that's followed by a half-wry quirk of his lips, though it's short-lived. It could hardly stay on his face for that kind of question, but as was often the case with Hannibal, there's little hesitation in his answer. There never is when he's faced with difficult questions. ]
Because you couldn't stay. You always knew.
[ Hannibal speaks with such certainty about Will and how he feels or thinks, but really, when hasn't he? He's always known Will's thoughts. Even if he was the one to put them there in the first place. ]
Jack Crawford would have always returned to ask for your help. Circumstance aligned that when he did, it would free both of us.
[ He turns his head lightly to look down at Will, and though he's tempted to reach out and offer a comforting hand to touch him, he refrains from it. It's his own desire more than Will's, and with this question in the air, he's more delicate. ]
And, to be honest, I wanted to see you. [ He won't lie about that, at least... Though he does ask a question in return. ] Did it feel like a long three years, Will?
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A laugh escapes him, tired and accepting. There's really nothing for him to say here but -- ]
Yes, it did.
[ Because god, how he missed Hannibal. It was like a tear in his soul and while Will is always willing to shoulder the burden for the good of everything -- it still hurt, every single day. He finds himself squeezing his eyes shut tight because even with how happy he was most days just spending his quiet with Molly, there was still that ache. That... shameful, buried desire to just go back and change his circumstances, just say yes to Hannibal when he so desperately wanted to.
Jack was always going to ask for one more time and Will was always going to use it to see Hannibal again. Three years or thirty years, Will would've done the exact same thing he did if given the opportunity. When he speaks again, it's quiet and barely audible for how much shame and hurt laces the words. ]
I missed you so much.
[ And god, despite everything, they're together again. ]